With a new year comes new focus for most folks. For many, thoughts turn to improving their well-being, whether mental or physical, by creating healthy habits. But rather than just focusing on purely superficial results, such as losing five pounds, people are attempting to dig deep into all aspects of their lives with the help of experts.
Nancy Stone of Stone Wellness Coaching describes wellness coaching as “a client-centered collaborative approach where the main goal is to make long-term sustainable transformation where the client is seen as the expert in his or her own life. The client is choosing the goals to work on and determining for themselves what is most important to them. Past approaches have been more of a one-size-fits-all, but wellness coaching takes individual needs into account by helping them get the clarity that they need around what is most important to them. And then once that clarity comes, it’s a lot easier to find an action plan.”
We spoke with Stone and Heath Wessling, founder and owner of Kansas City Wellness Club, for their expert insights on achieving better interpersonal wellness in 2024.
Reflection
“People often feel like they’re just going through the motions each day,” Wessling says. “They have these priorities that they set for themselves, but that tidal wave of modern-day life hits them and they can’t rise above it during that day, and they end the day disappointed that they couldn’t get as much done as they wanted to. A lot of people don’t even know how to reflect really well and then take that reflection into action and say, ‘How’s tomorrow going to be different? What did I learn from today?’ What are you tolerating in your life that probably needs to be cut out because maybe it’s not serving your higher purpose? Are you getting to the end of the day and you’re disappointed with everything you didn’t do? Are you ever taking a moment to be grateful for what you did do or be grateful for what did come your way that day?”
Remember past successes
“Most of my clients come to me because they are stuck and off track,” Stone says. “Generally, there is a sense of ‘I’ve tried so many things and failed.’ And sometimes my clients are also noticing that their biometrics are trending in the wrong direction—blood work, trouble sleeping, their weight is suddenly different from what it once was. There’s a feeling of ‘I am stuck. My life is off track.’ And so I will guide people to go back to those past experiences where you just nailed it. Get really specific: Who were you with? What were you doing? How did you feel when you did it? Pick it apart and then figure out for yourself: What are the most important elements? What really stands out for me, and how do you pull that forward? Revisiting our past successes and really digging in and pulling that forward is really helpful.”
Mindfulness
“A big part of being mindful is practicing a non-judgmental state of being,” Wessling says. “That means both non-judgmental to your outer environment as well as to yourself. Quite often, each of us can be our own harshest critics. Stop, breathe, reflect, respond. And if you can do that, you will find so much less doing or saying things that you regret. Do you actually act in that moment the way you wish you would have? What means the most to me at this moment? Do I really need to get caught up in this? Is it a distraction that I’ve been tolerating too much? And do I need to stop putting time and energy and thoughts toward that? It’s [important] to recognize what is causing stress in your life and what is holding you back from reaching that level of success in your life.”
Envision the future you want
“Six months from now, a year from now, what do you want to tell me you’ve accomplished?” Stone says. “What were those life-giving health behaviors, social connections? What would you like to tell me are the highlights of the year? Putting them ahead of time has been a really great trick for my clients because it’s a moment for them to really be intentional. What do I want to be doing? How do I want to spend my time?”
